What are the traditions that are particular to your family? Many people struggle to remember what they are, but they are very important as a conduit for improving relationships within your family. As for these relationships, do each of them have a ‘special time’ allocated to them that is unique to that relationship? If not, can you think of how you can make that happen?

Key points

  • Traditions naturally encourage family connections.
  • Every relationship within a family should have at least some special time allocated to it.
  • Traditions and special times allow a child and parent to really get to know one another.

Traditions and special times are great!

Firstly, traditions. A tradition is something that families, or parts of families (it might be just one parent and one child) do together. Traditions may be planned beforehand (and thus be looked forward to), occur at a particular time or place, have a predictable and repetitive content (which is part of the appeal), and be reminisced about afterwards.

Examples include:

  • A regular type of meal at a certain time (eg Friday night pizza, or Sunday night family lamb roast dinner)
  • Celebrations (eg a favourite birthday sponge cake, or New Year’s Eve fireworks)
  • Activities or trips (eg going to the beach on Australia Day, watching a particular sporting event as a family, all the cousins going to Grandma’s place for her birthday each year, collecting photos or memorabilia about family members, and displaying these in a special place)

Traditions naturally encourage family connections. They draw us together by providing a mutually enjoyable structure to connect within. They are a connection template, an agar plate upon which connections can grow and thrive.

Of course, you can also have negative family traditions. It may be a ‘tradition’ for Dad to come home trashed from the pub every Friday night. These traditions families could do without.

What are your family traditions, or what new traditions could you cultivate to foster those connections?

Special times are times purposefully set aside to nurture a particular relationship within a family. These special times may be between a father and a daughter, a mother and her son, or even between two parents (such as a regular ‘date night’ without the kids). Every relationship within a family should have at least some special time allocated to it.

This may mean going away together, having a meal together, or doing an activity together (that maybe others in the household don’t do and/or don’t want to do). Examples may include a dad taking a son to the footy, a mother teaching her second daughter how to make a cake, or maybe a mum taking her daughter to the footy (let’s not gender stereotype here!).

Like traditions, special times allocate a time and space for connections to occur. They are bonding experiences, and break down communications barriers that can develop in the hurly burly of family life.

Traditions and special times allow a child and parent to really get to know one another, how they relate to each other and the rest of the family. They nurture a sense of self, family and home.